“It’s not easy to perceive the world differently, but love, acceptance, understanding, and positive emotions are key to making a special childhood real”
For the International Autism Awareness Day, we are presenting the “Not Invisible and Unbreakable. Stories about the lives and challenges of Ukrainian autistic children during the war” project. With the information support of INVAK.INFO, we are telling the stories of 12 families who have learned to live on after the tragic day of February 24, 2022. The families share their experiences and feelings, secrets of overcoming difficulties in Ukraine and abroad, and each family is united with an irrefutable belief in the soonest and most long-awaited Victory.
Nikita Zakhovayko is a cheerful, non-verbal autistic boy from Kyiv who, at five years old, loves to swim in the pool, ride horses, and play the piano. During the full-scale invasion of Ukraine, the family has experienced relocation, children’s tears, and a constant state of depression due to the radical change in their lives. But they continue to fight with all their strength for their child and the Ukrainian Victory.
February 24, 2022
On February 24th, 2022, the Zakhovayko family instantly lost their plans for the evening, their plans for tomorrow, their understanding of reality, and the obvious difference between good and evil. Like every Ukrainian, on that terrible morning, the world turned upside down, and the only thing on their minds was safety. Nikita’s mother, Yana, recalls:
“That day, everything came to an end. We just got in the car and drove to my parents’ house in the Cherkasy region. We didn’t know how long we were leaving home for, but we hoped it wouldn’t be long. That’s why we didn’t take almost any games or teaching tools for Nikita. It was only when we were away from home that I realized what this meant for my son, because time is the most valuable thing with autism. I called our therapist, whose classes Nikita attended regularly, asking her to help and suggest what we could do without the usual home equipment. I am very grateful for her help, because then we started making educational tools, inventing games and activities with everything we had at home, and my journey of learning and helping other families raising children with special needs began.”
The boy and his mother stayed with their grandparents until April 2022. Unfortunately, upon returning home, they learned that the kindergarten, like all educational facilities in Ukraine, was not yet open for security reasons, and that various sports and developmental facilities were not open either. It was difficult to find teachers for Nikita during that period of chaos and unpredictability. So the little boy stayed at home with his mother for a year and a half after the war started and attended whatever classes were available, while his mother spent every day with him, trying out therapy techniques and everything she studied about autism at night.
Until the age of two, Nikita grew up to be a wonderful boy, and his parents had no idea that their child might have a disorder. He ran, played, understood what his parents were saying, talked, loved traveling with the whole family, and swam in the pool. However, according to Yana, her son’s condition and behavior changed dramatically after the vaccination:
“Our life was divided into ‘before’ and ‘after’, and I still can’t watch photos and videos from Nikita’s childhood without crying. His words had completely disappeared, he didn’t react to his name, and his motor skills got worse. Instead of a lively and active son, my husband and I saw a passive, sedentary child who was not interested in anything. I had to teach him everything all over again through tears and pain. At the time, we did not know about our son’s genetic and metabolic disorders. We received this crucial information from doctors only when Nikita was four years old, and vaccinations were simply contraindicated. They caused a severe immune response. Therefore, before vaccinating a child with an autism spectrum disorder, a full health check is required to confirm that the immune system can withstand the stress.”
When the boy was diagnosed with possible ASD at the age of two years and one month, the Zakhovayko family began a cycle of doctors, tests, teachers, and experts. And it worked. The child had not returned to the previous level, but the mother confirmed that there were positive changes. However the continuous air raids are very exhausting for Nikita’s psyche, which creates obstacles to a faster rehabilitation pace. Moreover, the boy does not speak, and his parents can only guess about their son’s true feelings.
2025
“Nikita always intuitively senses the upcoming missile attacks and gets very nervous. Once, before the bombing of Kyiv and the 72-hour blackout, my son could not sleep, and I tried to get him to sleep at least a little bit, but it didn’t work. At 16:00, the shelling started, after which there was no water and no electricity. I decided to go for water with Nikita, and while we were standing in line, he finally fell asleep in my arms. You know, the hardest thing for parents of special children at this time is not knowing what is going on in your child’s soul, because the only thing you can hear is screaming and crying on the way to the shelter,” Yana shares her feelings.
Now Nikita attends a wonderful kindergarten, regularly swims in the pool, and works with a speech therapist. Every day, his mother also conducts classes with elements of ABA and neurocorrection. His father, who loves his son and believes in him, helps with the physical activities. Nikita also loves to ride horses (it is very calming and relaxing for him), and plays the piano. The family is proud of every achievement of their son, every small step that Nikita takes, because they sincerely believe that their son will be happy and succeed in everything.
The boy’s mother, having invaluable experience of successful home-based work with her son, works with other children with ASD in Kyiv. She runs an Instagram blog for parents of children with ASD, where she shares useful information about the development of children with neurodevelopmental disabilities, creates individual development programs for children, teaches parents to work with children and understand their needs, and thus helps other families raising children with mental disabilities:
“It was my son who chose my path, and now I help children with special needs, and I am happy about it. I also learned to better understand his needs and emotional state. We are actively improving his metabolic disorders, and I am happy with every word Nikita says. I call on all mothers and fathers to believe in their children, to have them properly diagnosed, to work hard every day, and to love and support them endlessly. Because only comprehensive and regular work brings results. That’s the only secret.”
