For the International Autism Awareness Day, we are presenting the “Not Invisible and Unbreakable. Stories about the lives and challenges of Ukrainian autistic children during the war” project. With the information support of INVAK.INFO, we are telling the stories of 12 families who have learned to live on after the tragic day of February 24, 2022. The families share their experiences and feelings, secrets of overcoming difficulties in Ukraine and abroad, and each family is united with an irrefutable belief in the soonest and most long-awaited Victory.

Danylo Iskiv – a 15-year-old cheerful and active autistic teenager from Lviv who misses a peaceful life. During the three years of war, the boy’s family went through the routine of military life. But despite the difficult circumstances, uncertainty and fear, the family is confidently walking its path of care and unity. The family helps others and fiercely believes in Victory. 

February 24, 2022

Danylo’s family met the beginning of the Russian full-scale invasion at home. The day before, the boy was alarmed by the conversations of adults he overheard. Danylo understood that the enemy was pulling up equipment to the borders of Ukraine, but the first few days were a time of disorientation for all. The boy was constantly interested in the details of the attack. He brought a map of Ukraine to understand what was happening and what to expect. 

From the first days of the war, the family decided to stay in Lviv. According to Danylo’s mom, any change is too difficult for autistic children. One cannot envy those who have faced difficulties in adapting to a new place, a new routine, mentality, and language. In addition, at the time of the outbreak of hostilities, the family lived in a city far from the area of attack. Their faith in the Ukrainian Armed Forces was greater than their fear that the country could be completely overrun. Anna recalls that time: 

“In the first months of the war, adults were riveted by the news, while children did not attend school and spent time at home. From the very beginning, our family joined in helping refugees. We had many developmental centers in the city, which we immediately converted into temporary shelters for families with autistic children who evacuated from the hottest spots and planned to head further abroad. Danylo helped to wash and hang bedding, carry boxes of food, clothes, and blankets. We also invited everyone to our house to take a bath, and my son kept asking why so many people were suddenly visiting our bathroom.” 

During the war, Anna and her colleagues completed eight projects aimed at helping autistic children and their families with adaptation, development, and behavioral difficulties. 

2025

Today, Danylo continues his studies at a typical school on an Inclusive basis. He has been attending it for a long time and enjoys it. The teachers know him well and love him, and support him, adapting the requirements to the teenager’s educational needs. The boy is comfortable among his peers, has friends who accept his peculiarities, and stand by his side. Danylo also has a personal assistant who helps him in difficult situations, including social issues. According to his mother, the atmosphere at school is a great achievement and good luck. In general, since the diagnosis, the family has been very lucky with professionals – doctors, educators, tutors, teachers: they are all involved, interested in helping, and never pass by. Of course, the main work falls on the shoulders of the parents. Ever since Danylo was little, the family has been studying and working with their son at home to develop and consolidate what he learned in kindergarten or developmental classes. Home has become a lifeline for Danylo, as it is where he calms down and adapts to the conditions of war:

“Home is the main support for Danylo. He has a familiar schedule, a familiar school and classes, people, things, and places. I can’t even imagine the stress that children and families face after a sudden forced change of home, when staying in another country requires adaptation to the environment, conditions, culture, and language. 

Danylo calmly reacts to air raid alerts, the need to take shelter, warnings, and news of shelling. It’s scary to say, but my son is so accustomed to the realities of war that they don’t affect him. However, he asks every day when the war will end. He wants to see airplanes circling over Ukraine again, and dreams of traveling again. He dreams of stopping the deaths of innocent people, desperately believes in the soonest possible end to this terrible war,” says Anna. 

She is sure that there is no special secret that helped adapt Danylo and his family to the conditions of war. Anna believes that the most important thing is support and love, sincere conversations, clear explanations, and shared dreams that will come true: “The calmness of parents is important for any child, because when everyone is excited, anxious, and frightened, this state is transmitted to the child. With us, Danylo seems to be even calmer than us, living his life. After all, when else can he live his life but in the present?”

For the International Autism Awareness Day, we are presenting the “Not Invisible and Unbreakable. Stories about the lives and challenges of Ukrainian autistic children during the war” project. With the information support of INVAK.INFO, we are telling the stories of 12 families who have learned to live on after the tragic day of February 24, 2022. The families share their experiences and feelings, secrets of overcoming difficulties in Ukraine and abroad, and each family is united with an irrefutable belief in the soonest and most long-awaited Victory.

Ihor Zinkivskiy – a 20-year-old handsome and athletic young man from Vinnytsia. During the three years of the terrible war, the Zinkivsky family went through all the possible challenges faced by families with autistic children. It is not only about fear for the life and safety of their relatives. It is also about the difficulty of overcoming the consequences of a tragedy for a person who does not understand what is happening around them. But despite the circumstances and fear, the close-knit family continues to live and be grateful for every minute, help others and support the Armed Forces of Ukraine. 

February 24, 2022

The family, like most Ukrainians, received the shocking news of the Russian full-scale invasion at home. It was impossible to comprehend the harsh reality, but Ihor’s parents immediately decided to move abroad until the war ended. The boy’s mother, Olesia, recalls her fear for her son’s future:

“Ihor did not understand at all what had happened and why we were so concerned. But I clearly realized this: if there is fighting in our city, no one will have a chance to escape. My son is already an adult, and it is impossible to take him to a bomb shelter by force. Moreover, he would perceive explosions and air raids not as something scary and threatening, but as fireworks. So his misunderstanding of the situation, the danger, and the fact that someone intentionally wanted to do harm could easily cost him his life.” 

The decision to move was not an easy one, but it was the only right thing to do at the time. The Zinkivsky family is one of those who currently live abroad, but are firm on returning home after the Victory. That is why the family continues to work on projects of their NGO, which runs a system of supported living in Vinnytsia. According to Olesia, supported living is the only optimal option for a person with severe developmental disabilities. It allows them to live a full life independently of their family. However at present, this service is hardly supported by the state. It is underfunded, and the system of supported living as an approach to solving the problem of the future of people in need rests only on the shoulders of caring people. Still, the family is convinced that the time will certainly come when all their efforts will be crowned with success, and parents of children with disabilities will be confident that their children will have the necessary state care in adulthood. 

2025

Despite the sudden unplanned changes in his life, environment, and language, Ihor gradually adapted to his temporary stay in Germany. According to his mother, it was a very difficult challenge, as their son is a non-verbal person with autism. The family needed all the strength, unity, love, knowledge and experience gained over the years of raising an autistic son and helping others to get through their journey without losing faith in their abilities and their child’s happy future. Olesia shares her impressions:

“You never know how a child’s health will react to changes. So, we faced a new serious challenge. A year after the start of the big war, our son developed epilepsy. At the moment, we don’t know whether Ihor had epilepsy for a long time, which we didn’t even know about, or whether it was the result of stress due to moving to another country and the difficult process of adaptation in a new place. So now we have a new task – find out the real cause of epileptic attacks, which is extremely difficult abroad.” 

But despite his health deterioration, Ihor continues to study and attend a special school. Before the war in Ukraine, the young man went to a regular secondary school and studied in an inclusive class. Unfortunately, he was a few years late with his admission – only at the age of 11 was Ihor granted the right to enter a public school and exercise his right to education on an equal footing with other children. In Germany, the special school system is quite good. The main task of teachers is not so much to teach students academic skills as to maximize the child’s socialization. Also, German education provides for the availability of personal assistants for children who need them, as well as an extensive specialized transportation system (school buses). This makes it much easier for families of children with developmental disabilities to organize the educational process.  

“For us, Ihor has been a book since birth, each page of which brings new challenges and discoveries. For example, we were pleasantly surprised that our son likes European medieval architecture. We are also amazed by his development and achievements in sports. He continues to swim and prove his championship, which he won at the Paralympics. He continues to perform amazing stunts on his bicycle, getting great pleasure from his rides. But the most important thing for him is to have his parents by his side. He very subtly feels our mood, anxiety, care or nervousness. So we try to do our best to make our child feel happy. Ihor’s father and I are working very hard to create a system of supported living in Ukraine so that our son does not end up in an orphanage.” 

Olesia emphasizes that their family was among those who hoped that the war would end quickly. They would soon return home and continue to live their very familiar lives. For Ihor, life in Germany would be a short, unexpected vacation, and the horrors of war and the suffering of millions of Ukrainians would be a bad dream. Unfortunately, this did not happen, but we must go on living.

“It seems we will never be able to accept and come to terms with what is happening. It just doesn’t fit in the head of a healthy person. And all we can do is live and help the Armed Forces. Even if it’s small donations, weaving nets, making trench candles or small energy kits that you can make with your own hands. Any help is an important contribution to the Victory. And, of course, not to give up in the face of any challenges and to believe. It is faith that makes miracles happen and saves people where it seemed impossible to save them,” Olesya says.

For the International Autism Awareness Day, we are presenting the “Not Invisible and Unbreakable. Stories about the lives and challenges of Ukrainian autistic children during the war” project. With the information support of INVAK.INFO, we are telling the stories of 12 families who have learned to live on after the tragic day of February 24, 2022. The families share their experiences and feelings, secrets of overcoming difficulties in Ukraine and abroad, and each family is united with an irrefutable belief in the soonest and most long-awaited Victory.

Veronika Diadiuk – a 20-year-old talented artist from Poltava, whose paintings impress with their insight and awaken the best feelings in the heart. Her artworks amaze the viewers and win first places at art competitions due to their beauty and complex painting techniques. During the three years of full-scale war, the girl’s family went through a difficult path of escape from the enemy, relocations, separation and fear for life. But despite all the difficulties, the family continues to support each other, believing in the inevitable Victory. 

February 24, 2022

The Diadiuk family received the terrible news of a full-scale war at 5 a.m., waking up to a call from their friends in Donetsk. On the other end of the phone, they sounded desperate and wildly afraid: “Oh my God, this is a real war!”

Veronika’s mother, Victoria, shares her memories:

“Shock… The first air raid alert, a kilometer-long line to the ATB store, panic, and a three-day brainstorming session “What to do?!” How to explain to Veronika, a person who lives in a world of kindness, love, and positivity, that we are being killed?”

But despite the chaos and despair, the girl’s family eventually decided to go abroad to escape the russians. At first, there was no clear plan of where and how to go. However terrified Victoria and Veronika were, like most Ukrainian mothers with children, they went to Europe. In the first weeks of the war, the girl’s mother deliberately did not explain to her daughter what the war was, and why such a sudden trip abroad was happening. They visited Slovakia, Poland, and Germany, finally arriving in Sweden. However a month later, Victoria was forced to tell her daughter what was happening and that their sudden departure from home was not a joyful trip that Veronika had loved so much before the war. 

For 11 months after the outbreak of full-scale war in Ukraine, Veronika and her mother lived in Sweden, constantly changing homes. They stayed with a family of great-uncle Johnny, in an apartment near the factory where Victoria worked, and in a house provided by the migration service. All the while, the talented young girl from Poltava was saving herself by doing what she loved – painting – staying under the care of her mother’s friend. 

 Despite the safe conditions, the separation from home, the language barrier, and the feeling of alienation made it very difficult to adapt to a foreign land, despite the temporary situation. 

“Unfortunately, the choice of places my daughter could attend was small. It could have been classes at the church with very caring Swedish ladies or a creative studio for young children. Veronika would draw in silence because of her lack of understanding of the language. But the unusual place, and the teacher’s frightened look did not help her relax. Trips to the hospital by appointment three months in advance, the lyceum director’s refusal to allow Veronika to attend classes because of the language barrier, her lack of disability documentation, and many other problems only deepened her homesickness and desire to return as soon as possible,” explains Victoria. 

In January 2023, Veronika and her mother returned to their native Poltava. In the first days, they were terrified of every air raid alert, sometimes regretting and asking themselves if they had made a mistake by leaving peaceful Europe. But they were saved by an incredible opportunity to be part of the large psycho-emotional project ArtHealthHub by Zelo. It was launched by Veronika’s artistic mentors Yaroslav Ternovskyi and his wife, Alina Honcharova. The project allowed for an incredible number of creative art therapy and drawing sessions for families raising children with disabilities and IDPs. The participants were also united by many field trips as part of a super team of cool teachers in various areas. Veronika immersed herself in all these activities: preparing, conducting, making many new friends, hugs, descending to the shelter, and communicating under air raid sirens. Victoria tells us:

“We had an incredible feeling that we were doing something important, raising spirits and sharing with Ukrainians what we know how to do. Meeting families raising children with disabilities from other cities, hearing their touching stories, and spending many hours together working on creative processes gave us the strength to do our best.”

2025

Veronika is currently a second-year student at the Institute of Arts of Luhansk Taras Shevchenko National University. She is majoring in Fine Arts, Decorative Arts, and Restoration. She has friends among students and teachers who are trying their best to develop inclusive education. 

According to her mother, there are difficult moments every day. It is about emotions and fear after everything, the understanding that the noise outside is not fireworks, but a real danger. It is also very difficult for the girl to be separated from her father, who is defending the country in the Armed Forces, where he joined in the first days of the war. Although her parents divorced many years ago, she still misses her father and the short meetings every six months end in days of tears.

Veronika’s mother also notes that her daughter has matured a lot during the war and has become almost independent. The girl gladly helps her mother with household chores, because Victoria has to work hard and maintain an active life-work balance. 

“We live by the principle of always moving, helping others, and enjoying every moment of life. We are grateful and believe in the bright future of Ukraine and the Victory,” Veronika’s mother emphasizes.

For the International Autism Awareness Day, we are presenting the “Not Invisible and Unbreakable. Stories about the lives and challenges of Ukrainian autistic children during the war” project. With the information support of INVAK.INFO, we are telling the stories of 12 families who have learned to live on after the tragic day of February 24, 2022. The families share their experiences and feelings, secrets of overcoming difficulties in Ukraine and abroad, and each family is united with an irrefutable belief in the soonest and most long-awaited Victory.

Nikita Zakhovayko is a cheerful, non-verbal autistic boy from Kyiv who, at five years old, loves to swim in the pool, ride horses, and play the piano. During the full-scale invasion of Ukraine, the family has experienced relocation, children’s tears, and a constant state of depression due to the radical change in their lives. But they continue to fight with all their strength for their child and the Ukrainian Victory. 

February 24, 2022

On February 24th, 2022, the Zakhovayko family instantly lost their plans for the evening, their plans for tomorrow, their understanding of reality, and the obvious difference between good and evil. Like every Ukrainian, on that terrible morning, the world turned upside down, and the only thing on their minds was safety. Nikita’s mother, Yana, recalls:

“That day, everything came to an end. We just got in the car and drove to my parents’ house in the Cherkasy region. We didn’t know how long we were leaving home for, but we hoped it wouldn’t be long. That’s why we didn’t take almost any games or teaching tools for Nikita. It was only when we were away from home that I realized what this meant for my son, because time is the most valuable thing with autism. I called our therapist, whose classes Nikita attended regularly, asking her to help and suggest what we could do without the usual home equipment. I am very grateful for her help, because then we started making educational tools, inventing games and activities with everything we had at home, and my journey of learning and helping other families raising children with special needs began.”

The boy and his mother stayed with their grandparents until April 2022. Unfortunately, upon returning home, they learned that the kindergarten, like all educational facilities in Ukraine, was not yet open for security reasons, and that various sports and developmental facilities were not open either. It was difficult to find teachers for Nikita during that period of chaos and unpredictability. So the little boy stayed at home with his mother for a year and a half after the war started and attended whatever classes were available, while his mother spent every day with him, trying out therapy techniques and everything she studied about autism at night. 

Until the age of two, Nikita grew up to be a wonderful boy, and his parents had no idea that their child might have a disorder. He ran, played, understood what his parents were saying, talked, loved traveling with the whole family, and swam in the pool. However, according to Yana, her son’s condition and behavior changed dramatically after the vaccination: 

“Our life was divided into ‘before’ and ‘after’, and I still can’t watch photos and videos from Nikita’s childhood without crying. His words had completely disappeared, he didn’t react to his name, and his motor skills got worse. Instead of a lively and active son, my husband and I saw a passive, sedentary child who was not interested in anything. I had to teach him everything all over again through tears and pain. At the time, we did not know about our son’s genetic and metabolic disorders. We received this crucial information from doctors only when Nikita was four years old, and vaccinations were simply contraindicated. They caused a severe immune response. Therefore, before vaccinating a child with an autism spectrum disorder, a full health check is required to confirm that the immune system can withstand the stress.”

When the boy was diagnosed with possible ASD at the age of two years and one month, the Zakhovayko family began a cycle of doctors, tests, teachers, and experts. And it worked. The child had not returned to the previous level, but the mother confirmed that there were positive changes. However the continuous air raids are very exhausting for Nikita’s psyche, which creates obstacles to a faster rehabilitation pace. Moreover, the boy does not speak, and his parents can only guess about their son’s true feelings. 

2025

“Nikita always intuitively senses the upcoming missile attacks and gets very nervous. Once, before the bombing of Kyiv and the 72-hour blackout, my son could not sleep, and I tried to get him to sleep at least a little bit, but it didn’t work. At 16:00, the shelling started, after which there was no water and no electricity. I decided to go for water with Nikita, and while we were standing in line, he finally fell asleep in my arms. You know, the hardest thing for parents of special children at this time is not knowing what is going on in your child’s soul, because the only thing you can hear is screaming and crying on the way to the shelter,” Yana shares her feelings. 

Now Nikita attends a wonderful kindergarten, regularly swims in the pool, and works with a speech therapist. Every day, his mother also conducts classes with elements of ABA and neurocorrection. His father, who loves his son and believes in him, helps with the physical activities. Nikita also loves to ride horses (it is very calming and relaxing for him), and plays the piano. The family is proud of every achievement of their son, every small step that Nikita takes, because they sincerely believe that their son will be happy and succeed in everything. 

The boy’s mother, having invaluable experience of successful home-based work with her son, works with other children with ASD in Kyiv. She runs an Instagram blog for parents of children with ASD, where she shares useful information about the development of children with neurodevelopmental disabilities, creates individual development programs for children, teaches parents to work with children and understand their needs, and thus helps other families raising children with mental disabilities: 

“It was my son who chose my path, and now I help children with special needs, and I am happy about it. I also learned to better understand his needs and emotional state. We are actively improving his metabolic disorders, and I am happy with every word Nikita says. I call on all mothers and fathers to believe in their children, to have them properly diagnosed, to work hard every day, and to love and support them endlessly. Because only comprehensive and regular work brings results. That’s the only secret.” 

For the International Autism Awareness Day, we are presenting the “Not Invisible and Unbreakable. Stories about the lives and challenges of Ukrainian autistic children during the war” project. With the information support of INVAK.INFO, we are telling the stories of 12 families who have learned to live on after the tragic day of February 24, 2022. The families share their experiences and feelings, secrets of overcoming difficulties in Ukraine and abroad, and each family is united with an irrefutable belief in the soonest and most long-awaited Victory.

Mykola Krok, a 20-year-old non-verbal young man with autism from Chortkiv, Ternopil region, who loves horseback riding and music. Despite the city’s geographical remoteness from the Russian invaders’ shelling, Mykola’s family has survived it, experienced all the difficulties of life changes, but continues to fight for their child and Ukraine’s victory every day. 

February 24, 2022

The morning of February 24th, 2022, greeted the Krok family with terrible news that no one knew how to react to – what to do next, where to go, who to call… Mother Halyna recalls that in the early days of the war there were offers to come abroad, but the family decided to stay at home because they felt relatively safe in Western Ukraine. Mykola’s hometown is a familiar place to him. He can only rest and relax properly at home. However, even the walls of his home did not help him get rid of tension and anxiety during the air raids, and the inability to go anywhere made him even more desperate and stressed. 

Before the war, Mykola was a very active boy, despite his neurotypical differences from others, and thanks to the sometimes superhuman efforts of the Krok family. He studied hard at school, and getting there was a real miracle, since no one had even heard of autism and inclusion at the time – everyone was sent to a special institution. Later, the boy’s program for the mentally retarded was replaced by a program for children with developmental delays. It was too late to transfer the child to inclusive education by then, because too much time had been lost, and Mykola simply would not have been able to adapt to the new environment. 

“I was very pleased with the way they organized the learning process for Mykola. Teachers needed to adapt the material to my son’s abilities and his manner of communication, because he cannot answer questions verbally. He understands the language, but he can’t answer. He had very professional and, I would say, humane teachers. In particular, a Ukrainian language teacher with a degree in speech therapy, and his math teacher. And you know, the younger generation is ready to invest time and effort in teaching a special child, while the teachers of the Soviet era are unfortunately not. Therefore, the introduction of inclusion at a decent level will probably only happen when Soviet teachers are replaced by a new generation. Motivated, with a twinkle in their eyes and a desire to do their job as best they can. But in reality, everything can be gradually managed and all difficulties can be overcome, if not for this damn war, which turned our lives upside down, took our children and continues to cripple our lives,” recalls Galyna. 

It was only in June 2022 that kindergartens and schools, out-of-school activities, and centers began to reopen in the city. Mykola couldn’t be happier that his riding club, Horse Drive, was open again. He continued to ride his favorite horse Boutique, who had become a friend over the years, relaxing, enjoying himself, and not thinking about anything. But one day, an airplane flew near the center, and the building where the animals were kept was destroyed by an explosive wave. Thank God no one was hurt and the horses survived! The entire Krok family, as well as all the parents whose children attended the Center, trainers, and other concerned citizens, helped to rebuild and fix up the stables. 

In 2023, Mykola Krok completed his studies and entered Chortkiv Vocational School to become an information processing and computer software operator. He also attends the Vasyl Marmus Chortkiv School of Arts for the piano class. 

2025

Before the full-scale invasion, Mykola Krok willingly visited the Road to Life comprehensive rehabilitation center, a unique place in Chortkiv for daytime care for people with disabilities over the age of 18. This was extremely important both for the teenagers with special needs and their parents, as in most cases, it is very difficult to find a friendly and safe space for their children. The center offered classes with a speech therapist, psychologist, and crafts teachers. The youth were also provided meals. Of course, a municipally owned center will always suffer from a lack of funds for its maintenance, but thanks to the efforts of parents, the center stayed open. 

Today the center where families became one big united family over the years, no longer exists. Halyna Krok says:

“Back in 2022, the city council allowed the center to reopen part-time at the earliest opportunity. Of course, everyone was happy about it, and our children rushed to the center. But the happiness was short-lived: our center was soon closed, and the community was left with nothing. By the decision of a city council session, the name of the institution was changed – the phrase “for people with disabilities” was removed, which regulated our right to stay in the center. We spent a year knocking on the doors of human rights activists, writing complaints to all possible authorities, and appealing to all possible instances and government representatives, and managed to get the group re-established with a separate room for our needs. But that room required a lot of money to repair and restore, so it was not suitable at all. And for more than a year, nothing happened – the youths were confined to their homes (14 people), and the authorities turned a blind eye to the problem. In the end, the families got a small room in the Schoolboy’s Palace, where youths with special needs could only meet twice a week.”

According to Mykola’s mother, such decisions make her feel discouraged, because everything that had been nurtured and established over the years has not only disappeared, but left the youths with nowhere to go. The young man adapted very well in the circle of his peers, performing at various events and plays, with roles that did not require verbal communication. Unfortunately, this opportunity no longer exists. 

The young man’s mother notes: 

“In these turbulent, dark times, Mykola’s condition, in my opinion, has not changed much. Fortunately, we were able to stay at home, because our town is relatively calm. This helped us to maintain our usual way of life, our son’s schedule and his hobbies. But is it really true? To be honest, I don’t know, because Mykola doesn’t talk about his feelings. Perhaps, somewhere deep inside, he is experiencing tremendous pain for Ukraine and its people, but he cannot tell us.”

For the International Autism Awareness Day, we are presenting the “Not Invisible and Unbreakable. Stories about the lives and challenges of Ukrainian autistic children during the war” project. With the information support of INVAK.INFO, we are telling the stories of 12 families who have learned to live on after the tragic day of February 24, 2022. The families share their experiences and feelings, secrets of overcoming difficulties in Ukraine and abroad, and each family is united with an irrefutable belief in the soonest and most long-awaited Victory.

Maria Nedorosol, a young 17-year-old autistic beauty from Brovary, is a cheerful and inquisitive girl. Maria’s family survived the bombing of their hometown, relocations, and the most unpleasant thing for any parent – the inability to explain to their child why the familiar world has changed and when will the horrors end. 

February 24, 2022

Maria found out that the war had started literally from her window. One of the rockets hit a military unit a few blocks away from the house where she lived with her family. Soon after, she heard other explosions, dogs howling, and saw smoke rising in several places. Maria is very sensitive to loud noises, so she immediately realized that something was wrong. Her mother told her that the war had started and that she needed to quickly pack her things and go to her grandfather’s house that had a basement. 

Maria’s mother, Victoria, says: 

“My daughter did not understand the meaning of the word ‘war’, but she realized that everything had changed dramatically. She didn’t go to school anymore, and had to leave her comfortable room behind. On the evening of February 24th, we planned a visit to the circus, which Maria had been warned about in advance. So the biggest disappointment on the first day of the war was that we were not going to the circus, we were not going to school, and we were not going to sleep at home. Perhaps this autistic perception saved her mind from all the horror that was happening around her, from the tragedy that even a healthy adult mind cannot overcome.”

During the first three weeks of the full-scale invasion, the family stayed in their town. By the third day of the war, to maintain at least a semblance of order, Maria got back to completing her schoolwork, even though an indefinite vacation had been declared. During the air raids, the family hid in the basement. They read passages from the school curriculum between the air raids. Then the outskirts of Brovary saw intense shelling from the Russian army, and the family decided to take the evacuation train to western Ukraine. 

“It’s like we’ve been preparing for this trip all our lives! It’s usually difficult for autistic people to change their place of residence and have no plan for the future, but we have always loved traveling by train as a family. So Maria endured the trip in a compartment with nine strangers, a cat, a dog, and a mouse quite easily. For three months, we lived in a quiet village in the Chernivtsi region with extraordinary nature and very welcoming people. The school resumed classes online, so my daughter studied every day and had a clear daily routine. In the evenings, we sat on the porch of the house and sang new wartime songs. We also managed to bring our beloved grandmother out of the occupation in the Zaporizhzhya region, and this added some (even if temporary) stability to our lives. Maria perceived these events as an exciting journey, because we tried not to immerse her in our worries about the general situation and the future. She did not fully realize the gravity of these events, and perhaps it was for the best.

In May we returned home. There was no more artillery shelling, but the air raids were constant around the clock. Whenever a siren sounded, my daughter would immediately go into the hallway, lie down in a beanbag chair, cover her head with a blanket and wait for the all-clear alarm to go off,” Maria’s mother describes the realities of the first months of their wartime life. 

However, domestic difficulties are not the worst thing, because they are temporary. According to Victoria, the hardest part was surviving the outbreak of war psychologically. It became immediately clear that it was extremely difficult for Maria to accept the destruction of her familiar world. In addition, three weeks under shelling was too much for a child who is very sensitive to noise and can feel the mood of others. Her emotional state became very unstable: at the slightest irritation, Maria would scream, have flashbacks to all the bad things that had happened in her life, and nothing could calm her down. The autoaggression and aggression that the family had managed to overcome a few years before the war returned. Maria would pinch herself or her mother’s cheeks painfully, squeezing her hands until it hurt. Her obsessive movements and swaying also returned. 

Nevertheless, the family has no doubts about Ukraine’s victory, and Maria has been saying this since the first day of the war: “Soon the war will be over and we will go to school,” ‘Soon the war will be over and we will go to the sea,’ ‘Soon the war will be over and we will fly on an airplane,’ ”Soon the war will be over and we will sleep all night.”

2025

Today, 17-year-old Maria continues her studies in the eighth grade, an inclusive class according to her individual educational plan. In some subjects, she needs adaptation, in some – modification of educational materials, and studies basic subjects according to the general education program. She also attends individual therapy and developmental classes at school. Socialisation is the hardest part of school for Maria. Her classmates are used to her; they can sometimes help and provide support, but they notice that she is not very interested in friendships and has a rather limited range of interests, which doesn’t make her popular. That said, she is comfortable not being the star. Her teachers have known her peculiarities for a long time, so she gets the assistance she needs. Since she has sensory hypersensitivity to loud sounds and bright light, it is sometimes difficult for her to concentrate on her studies. Sometimes Maria gets overwhelmed and cannot respond to questions. Then she goes to the school’s sensory room, which has a hammock, a balance beam, and a beanbag chair to recover. 

Before the war began, Maria was a fifth-grade pupil in an inclusive class at a secondary school. Initially, the girl studied at a rehabilitation center, but her parents quickly realized that the child should be surrounded by neurotypical children. At the time, her mother Viktoria was studying to become a speech therapist, so she managed to make Maria’s transition to school comfortable:

 “It was difficult at first, because autistic children struggle to pick up the pace of school. I also had to switch from being a mom to a teacher. I was responsible for another child with different educational needs, level, and pace.”

Nevertheless, she managed to do it. According to Victoria, five years ago there were only four children with special educational needs in the school, and later their number increased to 35, and almost every class is inclusive. The school now has an inclusive playground and sports ground. The school also has great staff: four speech therapists, an occupational therapist, and a psychologist.

“You can’t demand something and put pressure at once, it won’t help. But when you show kindness and praise, all participants in the educational process begin to listen and improve. And in about a year, everyone in our school understood what inclusion is and got used to it,” the mother recalls. 

Victoria considers her daughter’s experience of inclusion to be a happy exception, as she received understanding and help from all sides. Before she came to work at the school, Victoria was involved in social activities at the NGO “Special Family”. The organization appealed to the city council, and it organized the Inclusive Education Program even before the subsidies, allocated funds from the local budget for the material and technical base, equipment of resource rooms, and a bus for children with special educational needs to go to and from school. And just imagine what else could have been achieved in three years if the Russian soldiers had not invaded Ukraine?

Victoria explains: 

“The first year after the invasion was particularly difficult. Constant changes of plans, sudden air raids, the need to stop classes and go to the shelter – all this was very stressful. For Maria, as for most autistic children, a sudden change of activity is a real challenge. There were meltdowns, tantrums, and breakdowns. At a certain point, behavioral methods stopped working because cases of autoaggression began, so we had to go to the doctor for medication. Now her condition has more or less stabilized, because we are careful to keep the study load moderate and the day as predictable as possible. 

Another challenge is the lack of personal space. For three years now, Maria has been sharing a room with her grandmother, who moved in from the occupation. Sometimes she wants to be alone so much that she tells us directly that it’s time to go for a walk or to the store. The most difficult thing now is sleeping problems. Due to frequent air raids, she has to go to the hallway at night, which disrupts her routine and affects her well-being. During the day, Maria is either tired or overexcited. That’s why we give her an hour to rest after school. As for her nutrition, everything is fine. Before, we always tried to maintain a varied diet, but Maria didn’t have much of an appetite. Now that she has entered her teenage years, she is “always hungry,” and this problem has disappeared.

As a mother, I have also learned to control my state better: I read less news, spend more time walking, listen to calm music, and do sports. We strongly believe that the time will come when there will be no need to invent anything, no need to get used to anything, no need to hide in basements and go crazy with fear that this minute may be the last. We believe that peace will come quickly and our lives will be ours again.” 

For the International Autism Awareness Day, we are presenting the “Not Invisible and Unbreakable. Stories about the lives and challenges of Ukrainian autistic children during the war” project. With the information support of INVAK.INFO, we are telling the stories of 12 families who have learned to live on after the tragic day of February 24, 2022. The families share their experiences and feelings, secrets of overcoming difficulties in Ukraine and abroad, and each family is united with an irrefutable belief in the soonest and most long-awaited Victory.

Kyrylo Korzh, a 15-year-old autistic teenager from Berdiansk creates computer games. Kyrylo’s family has survived the occupation, the death of loved ones, and a relocation to Germany, and is still struggling to find their way through life away from home. 

February 24, 2022

“We were woken up from bed by a terrible noise and a shockwave. We were all very scared, but we immediately ran to the TV to find out what was going on. At that time, there was a second, even bigger and louder explosion. We ran to the bathroom. My husband ran outside to see what was happening when the third explosion occurred. Kyrylo and I sat in the bathroom and were silent. Because of the fear of explosions, my son began to have progressive encopresis and daytime enuresis. Any loud explosions – and he sat on the toilet. During the month of occupation of our native Berdiansk, my child and I lost 5 kg each.

Together with my husband, we arranged a bomb shelter in the basement of our house. My son was very afraid of the basement and never went there, so we had to prepare everything. We set up chairs, laid down futons, and covered the walls with waterproofing. We brought home photos, important documents, warm clothes, shoes, hats and motorcycle helmets, medicines, toys, a shovel, and a battery with chargers. And on February 27th, when Russian tanks were driving down our street with their guns pointed at the houses, my son and I were already in the basement. We even had to set up a toilet with cat litter just in case,” recalls Olena.

After the destruction of the gas pipeline, the city stopped supplying heat. It was very cold outside, minus 13C for two weeks. The house was frozen, and the tiles were falling off the ceiling. The father of the family cleaned out an old coal stove that had once been laid in and used as a cabinet for things. This saved not only the Korzh family from the cold, but also the neighbors who came to the basement to warm up and cook something to eat on the stove. But even though the stove was burning well, they could not get warm. And after a few days of occupation, the city ran out of food and bread, the Internet was almost inaccessible. 

However, more than domestic troubles, the family was worried about Kyrylo’s psychophysical state, which was regressing every day. So the family had to invent computer game mechanics for their life: 

“Until the explosions were heard, my son would be online all the time, programming games. We didn’t bother him. And when the alarm started, we would rush to the basement, sometimes for an hour, and sometimes for half a day. I baked bread in the oven with homemade yeast (we had no other yeast) and cookies for my son. Unfortunately, Kyrylo’s encopresis and enuresis got worse. We could not control it. And we overcame the disorders of the psycho-emotional state with the help of games and programming. During the computer lessons, Kyrylo was not as focused on the war, and his fears temporarily receded. For Kyrylo, the basement, the sirens, the shelter, the tanks outside the window, and the unusual food all turned into a quest. At least, that’s how we tried to play the situation. But on the physical level, it was extremely difficult,” says Olena. 

However, at the end of March, the family could no longer stand the occupation and decided to try to escape the city:

“The road was long. We were traveling in a group – five mothers and five children. Everyone was traveling in diapers. However, we made it to Zaporizhzhia. Then to Lviv. Then each family chose its way to European countries. Kyrylo and I went to Germany.” 

2025

Kyrylo is now 15 years old and has been living in Germany with his mother for three years. According to Olena, the first year and a half of living abroad was extremely difficult. The family was constantly waiting for the war to end and for them to return home, feeling lonely and misunderstood by others, language barriers, everyday problems, and adaptation to a completely different mental environment: 

“My son and I went through terrible times: betrayal in the family, humiliation, violence, a dog attack, a refugee camp, living in a container, death of loved ones, nervous breakdowns, irresponsibility and complete alienation. At the same time, we were preparing all the necessary documents, but my psyche did not accept reality. I felt what my autistic son feels when all the inscriptions are in an incomprehensible language, when other people do not understand you when you want to speak, and only vowel sounds freeze in your mouth. I had to use a system of gestures and pictures. Now I know that immersion in oneself and one’s experiences postpones a person’s adaptation and integration into a new society, but back then we couldn’t do anything else, because Kyrylo had completely stopped perceiving other people. His stims intensified, he was always jumping and waving his hands, shaking his head.” 

The family lived in constant expectation of the end of the war and alienation for about a year. Kyrylo’s adaptation to the new environment was extremely difficult. He developed nervous tics and neurodermatitis, increased autostimulation, vocalizations and anxiety, and had problems with eating, as it was very difficult for him to get used to new food, tastes and textures. The boy slept with his mother all the time. At the social and domestic levels, the boy’s rejection of the German language and people of other nationalities, especially Arab and African cultures, was evident. According to Olena, the family found themselves at the beginning of the autistic journey with a complete reset of skills and abilities, experience and knowledge acquired during their lives. 

A year and a half later, the family received a social apartment in the city, and life gradually began to improve. 

“We stopped waiting to return home, because we gave up on the possibility of doing so any time soon. My son stopped packing his toys in his suitcase every day, and I gradually began to think of new ways to fill our lives. Sometimes he talks about returning to his native Berdiansk, but it sounds very uncertain and rare. Now Kyrylo is studying at a German specialized school in the 8th grade. In the afternoon, he is studying at a Ukrainian school individually. In other words, it’s a full-fledged day. On weekends, we go to the swimming pool to relax, and then go to a pizzeria. We also travel a lot – it helps to expand our life experience and enjoy life. At first, we missed the rehabilitation devices, sensory things and other equipment that Kyrylo used at home. But over the past three years, we have slowly collected everything. We bought little things similar to the ones we had at home, and built up a full range of physical rehabilitation devices and various exercise machines. They are our treasures acquired in Germany.”

According to Olena, the German education and attitude to learning are significantly different from Ukrainian schools. The European approach and experience helped Kyrylo overcome the difficulties of adaptation. In particular, his school assistant quickly found the right approach. The boy studies well, and most importantly he found friends with whom he communicates at school and chats outside of it. Kyrylo is also respected and praised for his abilities by teachers and classmates. This is a very welcome change from his classmates back in Ukraine who used to insult him. Kyrylo continues to do his favorite thing – developing computer games, which he now shows to his German friends. But despite his significant success, he is still afraid of airplanes flying over the city – there are many of them and they are loud. There are also fighter jets flying overhead. Sometimes, fire sirens scream. And he still can’t get warm…” 

Olena and Kyrylo communicate with other families that are raising autistic children and were also forced to leave their homeland due to the war. This connection is very valuable for the family, because people with the same experience can better understand, support and inspire each other. 

“Once, during a German class, I saw a man who ran out of the classroom in tears and screaming that he could no longer learn the language, memorize words, or speak it. He was scolding himself for his inability and incapacity to master new knowledge. At the time, I thought he was strange, but a few weeks later I had a nervous breakdown for the same reason. I was supposed to learn German, but I couldn’t perceive the language physically. In an unfamiliar linguistic environment, I felt abandoned, helpless, and completely stupid. However, I decided that my life, although destroyed, was still mine, and it was up to me to decide what it would be like. So I applied to a master’s program for online education and this year I received a master’s degree in social work and psychology. I know many families who have been helped not to go crazy by a hobby or job in another country. In general, support and finding new friends help a lot. A circle of new friends grows from one acquaintance. At first it is very difficult, but later we all begin to live our own lives in a foreign land, perhaps a new one, but still our lives.”

For the International Autism Awareness Day, we are presenting the “Not Invisible and Unbreakable. Stories about the lives and challenges of Ukrainian autistic children during the war” project. With the information support of INVAK.INFO, we are telling the stories of 12 families who have learned to live on after the tragic day of February 24, 2022. The families share their experiences and feelings, secrets of overcoming difficulties in Ukraine and abroad, and each family is united with an irrefutable belief in the soonest and most long-awaited Victory.

Illya Stepanenko, a 16-year-old black-haired autistic teenager from Kropyvnytskyi. During the three years of the merciless war, the Stepanenko family went through wartime hardships, relocation, family separation, and difficult adaptation in a new country. But against all odds, the family continues to unite and wait for Ukraine’s Victory to return home. 

February 24, 2022

For a long time, Illya could not understand what exactly happened on February 24th, 2022, because many things that are accessible to the understanding of a neurotypical child are extremely difficult for him to comprehend. On the very first day, his parents said that a war had begun in Ukraine, but the only thing that bothered the teenager was why it was suddenly a school holiday. Was it the quarantine again?

Life taught Illya what war was by demonstrating its horrors.The boy was brought to meltdowns every day by the air raid sirens and new safety rules.The family was very scared, and the surrounding stress and fear got to the teenager, worsening his state. His parents had to make a difficult decision to separate the family, which was unthinkable before the war.

And life changed forever: his father and older brother stayed in Ukraine, while his mother, Alina, and Illya himself were forced to go abroad to Germany. The journey took five days, which was extremely exhausting and stressful for a teenager with special needs. 

In the new country, it took the boy about two months to adapt to the new environment – get used to the new surroundings and school, restore his usual rhythm of life at least a little bit, and return to his usual diet. 

Unfortunately, everyday troubles and news were not the worst thing that he had to get used to and learn to overcome. Due to the war and forced resettlement to another unfamiliar country, the teenager’s psycho-emotional health was severely affected. For a while Illya did not show any interest or desires, and his mother had to constantly monitor his condition, stabilize his mood, and maintain his confidence and mental balance. It was only later that the boy began to demonstrate some desires, ask about what interested him, and set goals. He often repeats words in Ukrainian and foreign languages that calm him down to some extent: 

«Щойно закінчиться війна, ми повернемось додому в Україну… 

Wenn der Krieg zu Ende ist, fahren wir nach Hause in die Ukraine…

As soon as the war ends, we will return home to Ukraine…»

It was only in 2023 when Illya was able to meet his father and brother for the first time, when he and his mom came to see his family.

2025

Illya now attends a German auxiliary school for children with intellectual disabilities and continues to learn the language. Unfortunately, the boy has communication difficulties, but thanks to technology and teaching approaches, Illya is overcoming language barriers. His mother Alina, tells us: 

“Illya is in the 10th grade, which is a high school, a vocational level. At this level of school, children are taught to perform practical tasks, focusing on individual abilities. Every six months they re-test the students to clarify and adjust SMART goals, discuss them with parents (or caregivers), and agree on realistic ways to achieve them. My son has an iPad with special software for supported communication, which is usually offered for such purposes in the German educational space.”

At the same time, Illya continues to study at the Ukrainian school remotely, carefully allocating his time to it. Keeping up with the Ukrainian school is very important to him. He also attends online music lessons with a teacher from Ukraine and a new teacher at a music school in Germany. 

In general, Illya was always motivated to study, participate in family life, and improve his skills. Household chores and preparing family breakfast are a pleasure, not hard work, because these things unite the family and lift their spirits. Illya also takes remedial physical education classes and visits a psychologist several times a week. Playing the piano and singing are his favourite activities to this day. He sang before he could talk, even in his early childhood. He was drawn to music from birth. The teenager has perfect hearing, and when he hears unpleasant sounds (a drill, a vacuum cleaner, a creak, a false note), he feels physical discomfort. 

The family hopes that in the future Illya will do well, because the most important thing – understanding the purpose of life – is already there: “When asked by the school psychologist about what Illya dreams of becoming in the future, my son answered: “Happy”. And this is the most sincere feeling, which makes me wonder sometimes, who is truly neurotypical here,” recalls Illya’s mother.

Now, despite his thirst for learning and music, the boy is also experiencing the usual teenage difficulties that the family is trying to overcome together.

“Adolescence is a difficult time for any teenager, and a child with special needs requires special solutions. So we have to go to doctors, psychologists, and therapists.  My son was quite sensitive to how he was treated before, but as a teenager, he is even more sensitive and often takes offense to even a seemingly insignificant negative reaction to him or his behavior, which can escalate into a conflict. We try to help him with self-regulation, emotional control, and overcoming anxiety,” the mother says. 

Nostalgic feelings are added to the experiences of adolescence. According to his mother, despite the apparent adaptation and activity in Illya’s life, the boy misses home, his father, and brother. Very often the young guy recalls kindergarten and music lessons in Ukraine, remembers the names of all the teachers and assistant teachers in the kindergartens he attended as a child, and says with hope: “When the war is over, we will return to Ukraine…”

For the International Autism Awareness Day, we are presenting the “Not Invisible and Unbreakable. Stories about the lives and challenges of Ukrainian autistic children during the war” project. With the information support of INVAK.INFO, we are telling the stories of 12 families who have learned to live on after the tragic day of February 24, 2022. The families share their experiences and feelings, secrets of overcoming difficulties in Ukraine and abroad, and each family is united with an irrefutable belief in the soonest and most long-awaited Victory.

Ilarion Lehenchuk, a four-year-old smiling blue-eyed boy, is like an angel in both his looks and heart. The Lehenchuk family from the village of Petropavlivska Borshchahivka has experienced all the hardships of wartime, despair, relocation, and the loss of a child over the three years of the merciless war… But the family continues to fight for their son’s health together, waiting for the Victory. 

February 24, 2022

Five in the morning on February 24th, 2022, is a time and date that all Ukrainians will remember forever, because everything changed then, and life went to pieces. Oksana recalls: 

“My husband woke me up with terrible news. My courageous and strong man, who has a stoic character and temperament, said the word “war” in a trembling voice. He immediately persuaded me to go to my father in the Vinnytsia region. But that morning I was determined to stay at home, because the family should be together under any circumstances. We slept on mattresses in the corridor because it was safer, and closed the windows tightly so that the light from the lamps did not penetrate outside. And we prayed. We prayed all the time.”

At the time of the large-scale invasion of Ukraine by the Russian occupiers, Ilarion was one year and two months old. He had been speaking in full sentences since he was eleven months old, saying phrases like “Daddy went to work” or “It’s time to feed the cat.” However, when he heard machine gun fire or saw explosions and constant air raids, he gradually stopped talking. The boy was always crying or running to the door, pulling adults with him. 

It was simply impossible and irresponsible to watch the frightened children’s eyes, the daily regression, and psychological torment. On the night of March 11th, 2022, the mother took Ilarion, the most necessary documents, and the four-legged furry friend away from home. They returned only a month and a half later. 

“I tutored children in math and computer science for free. Unfortunately, the stress was so severe that my son stopped not only talking, but also eating and sleeping properly. He was constantly anxious and aggressive, both to other people and to himself. Ilarion would just fall to the floor or hit his head on the surface, bruising it, pulling out his hair, and biting himself and me. It was a nightmare,” recalls Oksana. 

The family’s suffering did not end there, as the Lehenchuk family lost their newborn, Ilarion’s baby brother. He was only a month old, and did not survive due to the negligence of doctors. Such overwhelming grief stunned the whole family, and little Ilarion’s stress, anxiety, and aggression became so much worse. 

2025

From September 2023 to August 2024, Ilarion periodically attended a regular kindergarten. The first teacher he got didn’t have the necessary skills to help Ilarion integrate with the other children. So the family decided to transfer their son to a group with another very skillful and sensitive teacher, who immediately took a liking to Ilarion. Her approach helped the boy socialize as much as possible, according to his mother. However, involving the child in a group of other children is not enough. Ilarion was unable to master the kindergarten curriculum. According to Oksana, it was because a child with autism like her son needs a special educational plan and assistance. A good attitude and good socialisation with peers is not enough. You need to be with the child all the time, and explain the same thing a million times to help them understand what is said. Instead, the general education program does not provide for individualized learning, as if an autistic child should automatically become a regular student by mastering the general program with no adjustments. And one teacher for 20 playful and active kids is physically unable to provide full attention to everyone.

The search for Ilarion’s root of his struggles began with endless visits to doctors before the war, but the official diagnosis of autism spectrum disorder only came at the age of four. The fact is, at the age of two and a half, the boy was diagnosed with a rare anatomical pathology – arterio-mesenteric compression of the duodenum, which required surgery. And this pathology was diagnosed at Okhmatdyt during an inguinal hernia operation after six months of the family visiting all the hospitals, listening to doctors’ accusations that the mother was feeding the child spoiled food (the pathology manifested itself in constant vomiting). Unfortunately, such an operation could only be performed abroad, because in Ukraine this was the second case in the last 15 years, and doctors had no experience in surgical intervention. So in addition to his psychological condition, Ilarion was going through an extremely difficult time adapting to a unique disease. He was put on a strict diet. Neuropathologists diagnosed autism at the same Okhmatdyt, after which the Legenchuk family visited various psychologists, psychiatrists, neurologists, etc. 

Oksana’s mother recalls: 

“At each doctor’s appointment, my husband and I were secretly waiting for the happy moment when at least one of them would tell us about the mistake. But no miracle happened, and our son has autism. The next challenge was to register Ilarion, because a family doctor or private clinic does not have such authority, and the district hospital has a waiting list for a year and a half. So, after several years of searching, we are now registered at the district neurological dispensary. I think that such an attitude towards parents is inhumane. The state has the tools to provide good diagnostics, professionals, and therapeutic interventions, but no one does it. The doctors on duty just dismissed him like a dog, and that’s it. What if it was their child?”

Despite all the difficulties, the family is united and overcomes all the challenges together. Unfortunately Ilarion’s current condition cannot be called satisfactory, and the attitude of society to his peculiarities leaves much to be desired. His mother has repeatedly noticed how children on playgrounds and in stores call Ilarion “underdeveloped”, “inferior,” and “backward”, while the mothers of those children just stand by and smile. 

How can a family find the strength to stoically go through ASD, bullying, their son’s unique pathology, the grief of losing their second child, and endless bureaucratic obstacles with constant shelling and bombardment of the Kyiv region by the Russians on top? How to stay sane in extremely difficult family circumstances and the inability to sleep through the night without waking up because of the air raid alarms?

“Art therapy is a great resource for my son. It helps him express his emotions and heal after severe stress. The kid sculpts, paints, and fantasizes, while I help him make it all into a single composition. Our strength is our family. We love, respect and support each other. Ilarion now has a sister, Mahdalena, who is six months old. Some people say that autistic children and children in general are very jealous, but this is not true of our child. He loves his sister very much, takes care of her, and helps me all the time. Especially in the first month after we came home from the hospital, he wouldn’t let my husband and me use the pram. He would push it himself, rock it, and even sing to make his sister fall asleep. And when she woke up and cried, he was the first to run to her aid.

We also love to cook and bake. Although he is very selective in his food and eats only rice porridge and bulgur, he has a taste for other dishes, knows how to decorate, cook, and serve them well,” says his mother. 

“Now Ilarion attends a wonderful specialised school called Eva, where we first met qualified, sensitive, and friendly experts. There is a swimming pool, neurocorrection, massage, speech and occupational therapy, physical therapy, and sensory integration. The three of us go to all the classes – me, Ilarion, and his little sister. However, getting to these much-needed classes is a challenge, because public transportation is not very suitable for traveling with a wheelchair and two children with special needs, and sometimes we have to wait an hour and a half for a taxi because no one wants to take the wheelchair and children in. And the nearest bus stop is a kilometer and a half away.”

However, according to the mother, the most difficult thing is the reaction of society to a child with autism. People are indignant, scolding, making comments about the “strange” behavior of a boy who can run around the store or scream because he doesn’t like the color of a taxi and doesn’t want to ride it, but can’t express himself in words. So, in addition to the horrors of war, stress, and concern for safety, Oksana believes that we should not forget about kindness and humanity, and always remember that sometimes things are not what they seem at first sight.

For the International Autism Awareness Day, we are presenting the “Not Invisible and Unbreakable. Stories about the lives and challenges of Ukrainian autistic children during the war” project. With the information support of INVAK.INFO, we are telling the stories of 12 families who have learned to live on after the tragic day of February 24, 2022. The families share their experiences and feelings, secrets of overcoming difficulties in Ukraine and abroad, and each family is united with an irrefutable belief in the soonest and most long-awaited Victory.

Andriy Tarasenko, an 18-year-old smiling grey-eyed boy from Kharkiv. During the three years of the terrible war, the Tarasenko family survived shelling and bombing, saying goodbye to their lives, and relocation. But despite the extremely difficult circumstances and fear, the family continues to live and enjoy every minute, believing in Ukraine’s Victory. 

February 24, 2022

Andriy Tarasenko’s family found out about the beginning of the full-scale war at 5 a.m. Their building shook and trembled from explosions less than 5 km away – the military base was under attack. Andriy’s mother, Vitaliya, recalls that terrible morning: “We immediately realized that the war had started. Although we had a plan of action – a packed bag with documents and valuables, an algorithm of actions – we were psychologically in so much shock that we could not act according to the plan. My husband ran to get the car, I woke up the children, and together we frantically started packing, not fully understanding what exactly we needed to take and how long we were leaving the house for.”

The family did not even consider the option of staying home, because Andriy’s family lived on the outskirts of Kharkiv, in the Northern Saltivka area. Only a 30 minutes drive to the Russian border. 

His parents recall that while everyone was panicking, Andriy remained as composed and organized as ever. It seemed that he was the only one in the family who remained calm. The teenager was packing his suitcase according to the list and could not imagine that everyone was not going on vacation in a hurry. 

“I couldn’t find the words to explain to Andriy where we were going and for how long. Later, I realized that my son’s composure was a manifestation of shock. All the time we were hearing the sounds of explosions, and the decision to go outside with our confused and frightened children was the most difficult one in my life,” the mother recalls with tears in her eyes.

After the war began, everything changed: the usual routines and daily routines were interrupted, plans and dreams lost their shine. 

The family couldn’t leave Kharkiv in the first days of the war: endless traffic jams, followed by enemy tanks and battles against the invaders for their homeland. That’s why Andriy and his family hid in the basement of a Kharkiv factory for 11 days. 

Vitaliy’s mother says: 

“This was a capital building with thick concrete walls and production facilities upstairs. However, the feeling of danger never left us. We slept in cots on the floor of the gym in our jackets, huddled together, and tried to keep warm. All conversations about the war were cut short when Andriy appeared: we did not know how to explain what was happening so as not to traumatize him even more. But on the third day of the war, my son spoke up. Andriy understood everything and reacted maturely. When the air raid sirens sounded, he was the first to run out into the corridor and not enter the room until the sounds of explosions subsided. When he fell asleep to the sound of artillery, he asked who was shooting – our military or the enemy. He kept asking when the war would end. I can’t even imagine what was going on in the minds of other children like him, who are just as kind and naive as my son.” 

On the night of March 7th, 2022, Andriy’s family survived a rocket attack. The factory building was shaking. Andriy clung to his mother and asked if it was an earthquake. His eyes were blinded by the sunset through the window, and explosions could be heard very close by. The family thought that this was the last night of their lives… If they managed to survive, they would flee Kharkiv as soon as possible. 

Andriy’s family headed for Poltava in the morning, hoping it would only be for a few weeks. On the way out of his hometown, Andriy saw houses and cars burned to the ground, empty streets, huge craters from shells, and a residential building still burning just a 100 meters from the factory where he had been the night before. 

“In Poltava, we were hosted by friends in their apartment. The sounds of sirens kept us jumping up at night and running into the hallway. They explained to Andriy that it was not safe in Kharkiv and that we had to wait for some time. Together we bought groceries, baby food, and diapers, and took them to volunteers who delivered them to our hometown. Later, Andriy was enrolled in a school in Poltava, which distracted him for a while and helped to structure his schedule. Walking in the woods helped him to relax and regain his balance, and the care and attention of his friends supported and encouraged him. However, weeks passed, and Andriy realized from our conversations that our house was damaged and we could not return home. My son had a meltdown,” says the mother.

He cried nonstop, and the parents could not calm their son down. They explained that Ukrainian soldiers are trying their best to defend our Ukraine, but the enemy has a lot of tanks and weapons. Since then, Andriy has been asking every day whether Ukraine will win and how many more enemy tanks need to be destroyed before that victory. 

2025

Vitaliya says: “During the war, my son grew up a lot, became more serious and wise. His carefree and smiling demeanor has been replaced by anxiety and withdrawal. His childhood is over. He knows that we cannot return home. Now he only asks if there is good news and if it is enough to return to Kharkiv. And we are waiting for it. We believe and wait patiently.” 

After moving to Poltava, the family and Andriy bought food for the defenders and sent it by parcel post. It became very important for the young fellow to join the defense and help Ukrainian soldiers in their difficult struggle. 

The family was relieved when they found out that the therapists who used to work with Andriy were alive and ready to continue their services: 

“We were no longer alone with the fears and difficulties of Andriy’s stress and trauma. Therapy gave Andriy an outlet to talk about his fears. The overall assessment of his condition was disappointing, but expected. Andriy had regressed due to the shock, and some of the skills he had developed over the years were gone. Gradually, step by step, we brought life back to his eyes.” 

Before the war, Andriy Tarasenko used to live a typical teenager’s life: a slender grey-eyed boy who loved to swim, travel, study, learn new things, especially foreign languages. The boy had a unique trait that autistic people often struggle with: a sense of humor. He was a prankster who joked a lot and could make people laugh. His peers loved him, and he was never sad at home. Although the teenager had problems with speech and learning, humor and perseverance helped him live a full life. 

Andriy went to school mostly by himself and with pleasure, although he did not always find the academic load easy. The teenager’s talent with languages made him famous throughout the school – his vocabulary and English pronunciation were a head above his peers. He was so fascinated by English that he developed an English accent when he spoke Ukrainian. Andriy had to visit a speech therapist for a long time to help him get rid of it, but it didn’t work.

In 2024 Andrii graduated from high school in Poltava, not his native Kharkiv. 

“One May day, my sister asked me: “I understand that a graduation ceremony is impossible for Kharkiv children. But still… What can we do instead?” I told her that instead of a graduation party, we should raise money together with the class teacher to donate to the needs of our defenders. And the graduation for children would be held online. I saw tears in her eyes. Tears of despair, pain, and pride for our children,” says the mother.

Now Andriy works with his father, helping to keep the paperwork. He refused to continue his studies, and his mother and father did not insist, given the circumstances. Ironically, his lowest score in his diploma was in computer science, and today he works at BAF (1C). His life has changed dramatically over the years. He has turned from a teenage boy into a handsome young man capable of being a full-fledged Ukrainian citizen. But at heart, he remains a worried child and occasionally asks questions: “Will Ukraine win?”, “Will we return to Kharkiv?”, ”When will the war end?”

Vitaliya notes: “The war continues… We got used to falling asleep with sirens. We got used to the sounds of Shahed drones over our heads, and the air defense systems responding with fire. We got used to the feeling of danger and the distance between us and our families. We learned to appreciate every day, every ray of sunshine, every breath, and to thank God for every moment. During the war, we realized that the most precious thing we have is our family, close friends, like-minded people whom we do not know but who are close to us, our love for our native land, and respect for the heroes who protect us. Understanding this inspires and gives us the strength to live on. To live for the sake of creating a world where people like Andriy will have a place and where they can feel dignified and protected.”